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Luck is being in the right place at the right time. So, to be luckier, you need to choose circumstances that fit you as precisely as possible:
- your achievements are higher in work you love than in work you don’t like;
- social media, clothing, and speech are a filter: the more accurately you present yourself, the higher the chance of meeting your people;
- at events and in places that feel close to you, you are more likely to meet potential friends, a wife / husband, or clients. And in places where you feel less comfortable, there is less chance of finding opportunities.
Consequently:
- your achievements are higher in work you love than in work you don’t like;
- social media, clothing, and speech are a filter: the more accurately you present yourself, the higher the chance of meeting your people;
- at events and in places that feel close to you, you are more likely to meet potential friends, a wife / husband, or clients. And in places where you feel less comfortable, there is less chance of finding opportunities.
Consequently:
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Because behavior is a result of state:
- in a +state, a person is more productive, decisive, calm, confident, etc.;
- in a -state, a person looks for quick ways to get energy (cheap dopamine), makes less beneficial choices, avoids tasks, etc. – because part of their resources (attention, energy, etc.) is spent on stress.
So:
- in a +state, a person is more productive, decisive, calm, confident, etc.;
- in a -state, a person looks for quick ways to get energy (cheap dopamine), makes less beneficial choices, avoids tasks, etc. – because part of their resources (attention, energy, etc.) is spent on stress.
So:
In other words:
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The exception is crises caused by an unexpected worsening of circumstances.
0% – a new project idea comes up, and you really like it → get scared of the risks;
30% – your current work starts taking more energy than it gives back → still keep doing the same tasks;
100% – your current line of work is practically dead because you have 0 energy and no desire to do it → I don’t want this kind of life, so what do I want? → that project I first thought about six months ago → go do it
The same scenario applies to communication with someone, health, etc.
Therefore:
0% – a new project idea comes up, and you really like it → get scared of the risks;
30% – your current work starts taking more energy than it gives back → still keep doing the same tasks;
100% – your current line of work is practically dead because you have 0 energy and no desire to do it → I don’t want this kind of life, so what do I want? → that project I first thought about six months ago → go do it
The same scenario applies to communication with someone, health, etc.
Therefore:
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Exceptions. Pain: from losing someone close; from an unpleasant result after doing something for the first time.
The way you see yourself determines the choices you make.
The way you see yourself determines the choices you make.
If the way you saw yourself were close to who you really are by nature, you would not make choices that lead to pain. You would react faster to what is destructive for you, without waiting for the situation to become painful.
Therefore:
Therefore:
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Results you are not glad with only show that you don't understand yourself well enough, since you ended up where you aren't meant to be.
Which means:
Which means:
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How much you do not know yourself = the amount of pain you experience. But in some periods there is more of it, in others less. So the distortion in the way you see yourself would be more accurate to show as a gradient with variables.
To define current values, it is necessary to decompose the pain:
1. OF THE PAST:
1.1. what would my score be if:
0 – I remember very little; my whole past is like a list of random dates from a history textbook / a summary of a video game character I’m currently playing as;
10 – I have many memories that give me strong +impressions; I would be very happy to live through my past again.
1.2. How often and how strongly have I had, and do I still have, the feeling that I’m not living my own life? (As if other behavior, thoughts, feelings, and life circumstances would feel more natural).
1.3. Have there been, and are there still, times when I get lost / sabotage / freeze up in a situation that could be called fairly ordinary?
1.4. How well do my efforts pay off in expected results?
2. OF THE PRESENT:
2.1. How is my memory doing now?
0 - the only way to remember something is to play detective, piecing things together from sent messages, photos I took, etc.;
10 - I have one clear timeline of past events, and it is easy for me to say what I did and when.
2.2. how much and what do I sabotage?
- personal and / or work goals?
- the basics? (closing the window before getting cold; going to sleep on time, resting, etc.)
2.3. my actions and decisions are based on:
- desires first, and logic only after;
- thinking about what makes sense to do now?
2.4. most of the time, I feel:
- okay :)) and better;
- okay (maybe) or worse?
2.5. do plans for the near future bring me a lot of +impressions, or do I feel neutral / apathetic, etc.?
2.6. Would I want to live through yesterday, last week, etc. again? Or were they more like a forced ad for a future film — the one I would actually want to live through again?
2.7. How often does my energy crash? Do I make up for a lack of +impressions from destructive things: reels, watching shows non-stop, chocolate, etc.?
So, the more positive the answer, the less distorted the self-image is.
*A huge number of questions can be created for decomposing pain. This list is an example.
1. OF THE PAST:
1.1. what would my score be if:
0 – I remember very little; my whole past is like a list of random dates from a history textbook / a summary of a video game character I’m currently playing as;
10 – I have many memories that give me strong +impressions; I would be very happy to live through my past again.
1.2. How often and how strongly have I had, and do I still have, the feeling that I’m not living my own life? (As if other behavior, thoughts, feelings, and life circumstances would feel more natural).
1.3. Have there been, and are there still, times when I get lost / sabotage / freeze up in a situation that could be called fairly ordinary?
1.4. How well do my efforts pay off in expected results?
2. OF THE PRESENT:
2.1. How is my memory doing now?
0 - the only way to remember something is to play detective, piecing things together from sent messages, photos I took, etc.;
10 - I have one clear timeline of past events, and it is easy for me to say what I did and when.
2.2. how much and what do I sabotage?
- personal and / or work goals?
- the basics? (closing the window before getting cold; going to sleep on time, resting, etc.)
2.3. my actions and decisions are based on:
- desires first, and logic only after;
- thinking about what makes sense to do now?
2.4. most of the time, I feel:
- okay :)) and better;
- okay (maybe) or worse?
2.5. do plans for the near future bring me a lot of +impressions, or do I feel neutral / apathetic, etc.?
2.6. Would I want to live through yesterday, last week, etc. again? Or were they more like a forced ad for a future film — the one I would actually want to live through again?
2.7. How often does my energy crash? Do I make up for a lack of +impressions from destructive things: reels, watching shows non-stop, chocolate, etc.?
So, the more positive the answer, the less distorted the self-image is.
*A huge number of questions can be created for decomposing pain. This list is an example.
